Review: Spectre (2015)

I’m not going to pretend I was excited about this because I wasn’t, I have never liked James Bond.  I find all the films very samey and nothing new ever happens, to me it all seems like money that could be better spent.  However, my Dad loves them so as the dutiful Daughter (and because I want him to see Mockingjay Part 2 with me) I accompanied him to see it.

Do I even need to provide a synopsis? James Bond (Daniel Craig) receives a cryptic message from the past leading him to a criminal organisation, that must be stopped.  I wish that could have been longer but I don’t really know what else to say!

Ok, ok I’m going to try and stop sounding so bitter about this whole thing.  In fairness, I didn’t hate it (I did take 2 naps throughout) but it didn’t keep me gripped nor was I on the edge of my seat.  In fact, instead of being worried when Bond is in precarious situations, I find myself thinking ‘well Bond will never die’ which kind of takes the edge off it.  Furthermore, in the opening Helicopter scene, I couldn’t help but think that the helicopter would have stalled at numerous occasions and crashed into hundreds of people, but that’s none of my business!  I know I am being too picky and fussy because I wasn’t interested in it all and you all know I don’t make such a fuss over the ‘defying of gravity’ in Fast and the Furious films for example, which makes me feel mean but I can’t help it, I didn’t enjoy it.

There were bits I did enjoy, I like Q (Ben Whishaw) and how he is becoming his own character and coming out of his shell a little bit, personally I would have liked a bit more screen time for him.  Also, in going against every review I have caught on this movie, I liked Christoph Waltz.  I really like him as an actor and when I finally got some screen time, I woke up and bit and gained some interest. His character’s motives do borderline on ridiculous and his long speeches lost me around the middle but I think he has a great presence and the development of his character can’t be blamed on him as an actor surely. 

I have also read that there are lots of inspiration from previous Bond movies in this installment and die-hard fans who have seen all of them will love influence they have had on this.  As someone who has only seen Skyfall, once, a long time ago, these homages to previous movies were lost on me.

I would like to like Bond movies but I just don’t and I don’t think I ever will.

Priceless Parent's Guide Finds #1

Did you know every movie on IMDB has a Parent’s Guide? It’s a useful tool for parents to decide for themselves if a particular movie is suitable for their child(ren), and I use it a lot to help my Mum and 13 year-old brother. It’s also handy for me to find out if I’m going to be able to sit through any kind of horror movie.

There are categories for sex & nudity, violence & gore, profanity,alcohol/drugs/smoking and frightening/intense scenes, and users are able to fill these categories with scenes of note.

Well, as handy as the Parent’s Guide is, it defines movie moments in such clinical terms, that it’s actually hilarious, and I thought it would be fun to share some of these priceless finds with you all. No spoilers ahead, not to worry!

As Bill goes through a phone, he sees pictures that the owner took, all focusing on a woman's breasts. (Non-Stop)

A dog is briefly seen apparently cut by half during a nightmare sequence; the head end then chases the tail end. (Inside Out)

It is halloween, several characters are dressed up (vampire, skeletons). A man in a tight-fitting costume struggles to get it off in time to go to the bathroom. It later transpires he didn't make it in time. (They Came Together)

Champagne is seen (Flightplan)

A man walks into a couple (sex implied) - we see the other man's buttcheeks for a few seconds, hear a little moaning (no female nudity). (A.C.O.D.)

A man out of nervous anticipation quickly finishes a bottle of beer. (Her)

Insulting another man, a man makes crude, sexually explicit remarks about the other man's wife. (Run All Night)

The opening sequence has silhouettes of naked women. (Spectre)

We see Ilsa in a bikini as she gets out of a pool. (Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation)

We hear eerie screeching coming from inside the walls of a maze. (The Maze Runner)

A man is punched in the face. (San Andreas)

Vlad mentions "boobies" (Hotel Transylvania 2)

A scene is shown where some men have to break into an employer's mother's house to delete an email that her daughter sent her by mistake. (The Intern) - note this is listed under Frightening/Intense scenes

A girl yells penis twice.  (Hot Pursuit)

Sexy dancing at a talent show. (Mean Girls)