Christmas Shopping, Movie Blogger Style!

Just a brief pause in movie reviews for a while, because my favourite time of the year is here, and also because Lawrence of Arabia killed me last week and I haven’t seen another movie since. I’m actually going to see Nocturnal Animals tonight though, so I’ll have that to talk about very soon.

But for now, Christmas has arrived (in my world at least) and Sunday brought my annual Christmas Present Planning Meeting. My husband was a little put off at the extremity of it all, until I told him the meeting would kick off with a big American-style breakfast out at one of our favourite restaurants. Ah, sweet bribery.

The reason I’m even mentioning this on the blog though is because I decided that this year, all of my christmas shopping will have a theme - movies! In previous years I’ve given dozens of Pop Figures (to curb my own addiction) and also board games (I buy the ones I really want to play myself) so I wanted a theme for 2016 too. I’m no movie expert by a long shot, but I like to think that I watch enough to be able to pick out movies for family and friends that they’ll enjoy.

Plus, it makes shopping a lot more fun. With plenty of little ones in the family, there are going to be lots of Disney movies on the list, and I’m torn between choosing my all-time favourites or picking out some lesser known gems. One of my cousins has reached that age where it's ‘cool’ to watch every single horror that comes out and pretend that they weren’t scary in the slightest, and thanks to Halloweenie I now have a few ideas for her.

Then there’s my parents, who love action and mystery, and anything with Tom Cruise or Bruce Willis, bless my Mum. I’m trying to remember whether they’ve seen Unbreakable (2000) yet, because they would love it. Not naming names, but I also have a family member who detests language in movies, so I’ll be heavily studying the Parental Guide’s in IMDB for the next week or so to find something suitable.

I have a brother who loves magic and all things weird, and I’m torn between getting him Chronicle (2012) or Now You See Me (2013). Does anyone know of a movie that heavily features a pug? I have a cousin obsessed with them, but she also loves horses so I have War Horse (2011) sat in my Amazon basket right now.

All in all, I am having a blast with shopping this year. It’s not a chore when you get to sit at your favourite little coffee outlet drinking hot spiced apple and talking about movies! Has anyone else started shopping yet?

I Sat Through Lawrence of Arabia (1962)

Gather round ladies and gentleman, it’s story time. I come from a movie-loving family, as you well know by now. I grew up watching National Lampoon’s Vacation every Bank Holiday. Nowadays, every Sunday the talk over the dinner table is usually themed around what movies we’ve seen that week, and once every couple of months we all get together on a Friday night for a family movie night which involves take out, and far too many pause breaks.

Our Whatsapp group will ping like crazy before these nights, with suggestions thrown in for which movie we should see. Our audience ranges from very young (under 10) to very old (sorry Grampy) with all ages in between, so finding the perfect choice is difficult. But you can guarantee every time, my Dad will suggest Lawrence of Arabia. Why? It’s his favourite movie, apparently! For years we’ve put up with this, and in turn he’s had to put up with us laughing at him. It was his birthday on 1st November though, and I suggested that we all give in and watch it together for his birthday. So we did!

Suddenly, one part of the family were ‘busy’ so our numbers were diminished. This might have had something to do with the fact my Dad announced he had a remastered version on DVD which included an interlude, bringing the runtime to just under 4 hours. Good Lord! Nonetheless, pizza was ordered, and we started the movie. Well, we started Disc 1 of the movie, because the thing is so big it won’t fit onto one disc.

Oh, were you expecting an actual movie review here? No, sorry, that’s literally impossible for me. I don't know how to review this I’m afraid. I will announce a spoiler alert from here on out however, because I truly don’t know what can be considered a spoiler in the tale of Lawrence of Arabia.

We start out with a message from the composer, who said something about his music being so bloody fantastic that any visuals would distract us, so we were greeted with a black screen and almost 10 minutes of music before we even started. Following that, confusion as we see Lawrence get his motorcycle gear on and go out for a ride. We were fairly sure a desert was involved in this movie. After that? Um. Well. He died! I mean, spoiler alert movie, GAWD.

To begin with, we all got quite invested in the story. Lawrence was a bit of a full of himself guy, but we liked his spirit and we look a liking to the guide that was with him in the desert. I think we were gearing ourselves up for a road-trip-buddy kind of movie, but then the guide got killed and we all felt a bit sad for him for a while. Who knew wells were so important in the desert? We mourned the guide collectively until we came across the two young lads that eventually worked for Lawrence. Our favourite moment was when one pompous guy shooed the pair away, and they retaliated by shoving their stick up his camel’s butt. That moment killed me!

So, some more things happened, lots of talking, some war, and the oldest of my two little brothers announced we were well over half way though the movie. Great, we thought! This hasn’t seemed so long after all. Then approximately thirty minutes later, the screen went black and asked us to insert Disc 2 to commence the interlude and the second half. WHAT. At this point our enthusiasm was shattered, my youngest brother fell asleep, and we sat quietly through the rest of the story. Even the dog had enough at that point. Let me tell you, much rejoicing was done when the credits finally rolled.

On a more serious note, the story of Lawrence of Arabia is quite fascinating, as we learnt that the whole time he was just being used by both sides, his passion taken full advantage of. The music was beautiful, and fit the moods perfectly. The visuals were a sight to behold (my youngest brother shouted out ‘hashtag silhouette goals’ so you know these visuals are on point). It was just at least 2 hours too long for me, for any of us, other than my Dad of course.

Our next family movie night is in 2 weeks time, and my Dad has stayed unusually quiet in the Whatsapp group. We’re all on the edge of our seats waiting to find out what his next suggestion might be.

So, to finally finish, I do recommend Lawrence of Arabia, but watch it over a couple of days.

Review: Swiss Army Man (2016)

Oh boy, I’ve been looking forward to Swiss Army Man for so long now, it feels like forever since the trailer was released. I’m surprised I managed to find myself a cinema buddy for this one. When I first saw the trailer I felt a mixture of shock and disgust, but a second viewing really opened my mind to the possibilities.

The easiest way to describe Swiss Army Man is: Paul Dano is lost on an island, ready to end his life out of desperation and loneliness, until he spots Daniel Radcliffe’s flatulent corpse washed up on the beach, and uses him to try and find his way back home. No exaggerations, there. You thought The Lobster was the weirdest movie you’ve ever seen? Think again!

Paul Dano and Daniel Radcliffe are an absolute delight. I’m not sure just how much acting Radcliffe had to do here, but nonetheless, he really pulled off the dead-guy demeanor. I don’t know enough about movie awards to know Swiss Army Man’s Oscar chances, but Paul Dano would be in my nominations list for sure. This can’t have been an easy role to take on.

If you’ve seen the trailer, you’ll know what to expect, but a few things did shock me whilst I was watching. First and foremost is just how gross this movie was. Flatulence is one thing, we all have it, let’s be honest. I’ve never had it quite so badly that I could propel myself and another person across the ocean, but still, that’s not the worst part. Hank (Dano) uses Manny (Radcliffe) as a water source by quite literally squeezing the liquid out of him. Hurck. The most useful thing Manny can be used for is a compass. How? His boner leads the way. Yep. That’s about it for grossness, but Manny can also shoot things from his mouth and chop wood. Swiss Army Man for sure!

The best part of the movie is the mystery of it all. I started to wonder whether Manny was even real, especially when Hank seemed to talk through his issues with him. Was Hank ever even lost, or had he just ran away? Hank has a fascination with a girl he saw on the bus, and re-enacts scenes with Manny by dressing up and even recreating the bus out of whatever he can find in the woods. It’s really quite incredible. I also thought Manny got more and more lifelike the more Hank started to find the root of his issues. He’s clearly a very troubled man.

Of course, there are also several laugh out loud moments. The boner scene was pretty funny until it got a little too much, and the first moment Manny spoke just to be punched in the face had me crying. Hands down, the best line in the movie is spoken by Hank: “If you don’t know Jurassic Park, you don’t know sh*t.” That line, coupled with the use of the Jurassic Park soundtrack, is nothing but pure genius, and is the real stand out moment of the entire movie.

I just don’t know how to feel about the ending. I mean, I don’t know how I wanted it to end myself, I guess I just couldn’t picture it. The movie itself is like nothing I’ve ever seen before, but the ending reminded me of Safety Not Guaranteed, and I never fully knew how to feel about that ending, either.

Swiss Army Man will be ‘too weird’ for many, but in a world full of superhero movies, sequels and remakes, this is a breath of fresh air for me.

Review: Doctor Strange (2016) Spoiler Free

I spend so much time complaining about how long the UK has to wait for a lot of theatrical releases, so when it was announced that we were getting Doctor Strange early I made sure to take full advantage and see it in the first week! That said, I wasn’t sure how to feel about the movie before I went. There’s no escape from superhero movies lately, and I knew quite literally nothing about Doctor Strange. Turns out I just need to accept the fact that Marvel doesn’t make bad movies! I promise to keep this spoiler free.

Dr. Stephen Strange (Benedict Cumberbatch) is a fantastically skilled neurosurgeon, albeit fairly arrogant and cocky. A horrific car accident leads to Stephen damaging the nerves in his hands, leaving his career and mind in tatters. He learns of a miracle case where a man paralysed from the waist down learned to walk again, which brings Stephen to leaving his love interest Christine (Rachel McAdams) behind and travelling to Kathmandu. Here he meets Mordo (Chiwetel Ejiofor) and the The Ancient One (Tilda Swinton), who teaches him the ways of mystic arts.

First of all I have to say, if you get the chance to see this in IMAX, go for it. It’s rare that I even bother with 3D but I heard on the grapevine that Doctor Strange had some intense visuals, and I was so glad I listened. It’s mind bendy as hell, guys. I want to use the words ‘visually stunning’ but that’s normally my get out clause for a bad movie. You know, ‘the plot wasn’t great, but it was at least visually stunning’. Whatever the next level up from stunning is, this is it. I honestly feel like it’s a game changer in that department. I spent the whole of the opening sequence with my jaw on the floor.

Doctor Strange himself is a difficult character to warm to, he’s often rude and disrespectful, like a cross between Tony Stark and Benedict’s own Sherlock Holmes. That’s his nature though, and you really do see his character develop throughout the movie. Tilda Swinton is another stand out star here, there’s a lot of depth to her character and she surprisingly has quite a few funny moments. I haven’t seen much of Chiwetel Ejiofor but he shines on screen too, and you feel the moral struggle that he goes through. Mads Mikkelsen is a fantastic bad guy, but really, what did you expect?

Another reason I was wary of Doctor Strange was that it didn’t seem to have the potential for the amount of humour that Marvel packs into it’s movies so well (take note, Suicide Squad). However, although it isn’t the funniest movie in the Marvel universe, there were plenty of laugh out loud moments that were unexpected. The ever stone faced Wong (Benedict Wong) brings a lot of laughs, but oddly enough it’s Doctor Strange’s Cloak of Levitation that steals the limelight here!

I found the plot quite complex (I have a simple mind, though) and it had a few twists that I didn’t see coming. I’m certainly looking forward to seeing it again to fully get my head around the spiritual-ness of it.

My only real criticism would be the speed that the movie moves through the section of Strange training in Kamar-Taj. It can be forgiven, as this is an origin story with a lot of content to go through, but it looked so much fun. You still felt the passage of time through the changing outfits (which were all stunning), but I’d have loved more time during that part.

As always, stay till the very end of the credits when you see this. It pains me to see so many people getting up and leaving as soon as the credits roll, and then another wave leave after the mid credits scene. You’ve sat there for 2 hours guys, 5 more minutes won’t kill you! 

I am VERY excited about the mid credits scene, my mind wanted to explode at the possibilities of where Doctor Strange fits in with the other Marvel characters. Very excited indeed!

Looking Forward to Seeing at the Cinema: November 2016

As always, I'm writing this post a little earlier than 1st November, so it's absolutely terrifying for me to be thinking about movies coming out in November when I haven't even started my Christmas shopping yet! For the record, by the time you're reading this, I'll have already had the annual 'Christmas Planning Meeting' with the Husband, probably over breakfast at one of our favourite American Diners. Spoiler alert for any friends and family reading this: you're all getting movies!

Enough of that though. This post is a little different this month, because there are a ridiculous amount of movies coming out that I want to see. It saddens me knowing that I won't make it to the cinema for them all, but hey, at least I'll look forward to seeing them on DVD next year. No, this month, there is a movie out every single week that I want to see!

I don't know much about Nocturnal Animals, I've tried to shy away as much as possible, because honestly, with Amy Adams and Jake Gyllenhaal as leads in a Thriller/Drama, that's all I need to get me excited. It looks dark, gritty, and I think there are going to be a few twists and turns as the story unfolds.

Nocturnal Animals will be released in UK cinemas on 4th November 2016.

Amy Adams is killing it this year! Just 1 week later she's starring in a Drama/Mystery/Sci-Fi alongside Jeremy Renner called Arrival. Again, I've tried not to dig to much into the plot of this one, but it's the Director that's really selling it to me. Dennis Villeneuve has directed some of my favourite movies, Sicario, Enemy, Prisoners and Incendies to name a few. This guy is hella talented, and I can't wait to see Arrival.

Arrival will be released in UK cinemas on 10th November 2016.

If you know me at all, you'll know how much I love Harry Potter. I started reading the books when I was just a kid, I attended midnight openings for the last 3 in the series, and if I really don't know what to watch, I'll stick on a Harry Potter movie. It's obvious that I'm looking forward to Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. Is the news about it being a 5 movie series true? I actually hope not, I'd rather have movies that explore other areas of the wizarding world, but I'll see them nonetheless.

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find them will be released in UK cinemas on 18th November 2016.

Shameless choice alert! It's been nearly a whole year since my Adam Driver obsession started (blame Benedict Cumberbatch for going quiet for so long) and so I'm desperate to see him in something new. He's been the only shining star in too many terrible movies, so I'm not sure where to set my expectations for Paterson. I also don't know how to convince the husband to see this with me. Perhaps Jenna will be free...she saw Midnight Special with me...

Paterson will be released in UK cinemas on 25th November 2016.